Editor’s note: BINGE may be triggering to some readers in recovery. With that in mind, we’ve excluded links to the series within this piece.  

I was a talented athlete.  I won accolades in high school, and pitched on the softball team for Villanova University.  I was voted All-East Pitcher of the Year, Academic All-America, and later I pitched professionally in Italy.

I became a fitness contest participant and winner, and model. I served in the United States Marines Corps, won leadership awards, became a platoon leader, and served in Iraq, leading 150 Marines on several dangerous missions.

While both anorexia nervosa and bulimia nervosa are associated with a litany of medical complications , with timely and successful treatment the vast majority of these complications do not leave permanent residual sequelae (conditions that are the result of a previous disease). 

While volunteering at a Los Angeles animal shelter, I met a brindle, ten-month-old pit bull named Sunny. She was very undernourished, and her tail looked like it had been chopped in half and then stomped on in three places. Yet despite her dire circumstances, a joyful energy moved through her. Every time I slipped inside her kennel, she came barreling into my arms and sprawled across my lap—her whole body wagging along with her stub tail.

Hello, gorgeous people, my name is Nikki. I am a model, host, commercial actress, writer, believer and dreamer. I am an advocate for NEDA, and sponsor those in eating disorder recovery because I am a survivor of a 17 year battle with bulimia and anorexia. At the height of my modeling career, I was known for my beautiful curves; however in Europe as my battle with anorexia overcame me, I became known for my bones. Recovery for me has been filled with years of ups and downs but I decided from day one to never give up.

I sat in the doctor’s consulting room, not knowing where to start sharing my problems of the past 18 years. The spectacled, middle-aged male MD gazed across his desk.

As an adolescent and young adult, tormenting thoughts dominated my mind. This was the late 1960s and 1970s, a time of optimism, girls-can-do-anything feminism, rock ‘n’ roll and flower power. My friends laughed, danced and were carefree. I strove to be like them. But I felt on the periphery. Nobody knew I was suffering an illness yet to be named - Bulimia Nervosa (BN).

On February 7, 2013, I had the opportunity to speak with a number of amazing speakers at the Norfolk Virginia Naval Station on the serious topic of raising awareness of eating disorders. The turnout was tremendous, the participation was excellent, and the question and answer session at the end was meaningful for all who attended. Not really knowing what to expect or what kind of response we would get from a room full of primarily enlisted Naval seamen/women and a few officers, I could not have felt more supported and blessed to be in Norfolk that day.